Some anniversaries you'd rather not celebrate...

In just about a week, it will be one year since my sister Dionna passed away, unexpectedly in her sleep.

I miss her everyday. Everyday something reminds me of her and every few days I cry for her. I still carry the her keys in my purse to the apartment she passed away in. I keep the few text messages I have from her. I visit her facebook page EVERYDAY and look at her face. I think of her every time I see the sun shining in my windows. I have a shirt she gave me less than a month before she passed that I will never get rid of and even after having washed it many times after she wore it, it still smells like her. The first holidays and her birthday without her was rough for my family as I'm sure they all will be. My family dynamic has changed forever. Many people tell me she's in a better place ...and I know in my heart she is but there are days that it isn't comforting to me at all because I'd just rather her be here with us. She, like all of us, did not suffer from the burden of perfection. She battled a lot of demons and before she passed she was actually starting to win.


This week is going to be rough for my family. If you have a spare thought or prayer for us, send it this way. I hope that one day we all get to the place that when we think of her, we can smile more than we cry. She was beautiful, she was smart, she was hilarious, she was a hot head...she was also a daughter, a sister and a mother.