I lost my sister in January. Even though we had a very rocky relationship, I loved her so fucking much. No matter how close to giving up on her I was, I never did. I always rooted for her success. Now she's not here and I feel like every single exciting moment or small tragedy will never be the same because I cannot share it with her. I have my oldest sister still who is truly one of my best friends in the whole world but a third of us is gone. It's not the same. It never will be.
I think I am officially depressed or maybe it's just a part of the grieving process. I go the whole day and sometimes days at a time and stay happy and upbeat and then one thought, one memory or one moment unshared slaps me back down to the reality of it all.
I miss her.
